Backyard Magic

Like the earth itself, our backyard has evolved over the years.

The Jungle Age predated our arrival in 2003.

Our first kid arrived in 2004, beginning a ten year period known as The Broken Toy Age.

This overlapped with The Weed Age (which continues to this day).

By 2014, I finally had some time and energy for the yard, thus beginning The Great Gardening Age.

There were years—maybe a decade!—in which the yard was largely ignored and had to fend for itself. I had three little kids and 95% of my energy went toward keeping them alive. Any yard project that required more than twenty minutes at a time was penciled into the next decade.

But life is a little less hectic now that the kiddos are older, and gardening has become one of my favorite hobbies. On weekends you’ll find me covered in dirt, and I love it!

2003: the northeast corner of our yard before any changes.

A year ago I considered posting about our yard projects but I was concerned that the timing was wrong. I did not want the post to come off as insensitive or braggy, right in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic. My friend M said that it might give people a boost to see something bright and colorful during a time when our spirits felt bleak. Still, I decided to wait, and I truly hope this piece comes across as cheerful and encouraging rather than as a brag fest.

Over the years, we enjoyed various aspects of our yard. We liked that the previous owners planted trees—they wanted this place to feel like home, rather than a temporary stop. The apricot tree was pretty and produced a handful of apricots (one year it yielded exactly one apricot, but why split hairs?). The overgrown tangle of trees and weeds provided nooks and crannies for our kids to explore when they were tiny. There were many hiding places for Easter eggs. It worked for us, so why change things? Plus, I was super busy with the kids and the yard was not an urgent matter. But at some point the kids grew and I could do a few “me” things, like working more in our yard. 

We added a few plants over the years, but the biggest change came in early 2018, when Hubby built a home office in our back yard. Hubby and I are both DIYers, and although I helped a little, he built it himself and did an amazing job. The color scheme and design matched our house, and soon I felt like it had always been there.

Winter 2018: Hubby's office is in the same corner that you see in the photo above.

Hubby's office, designed and built by my hubby, modest man who hates compliments. I think it's awesome.

I decided to build a garden wall, as the office met the patio in a way that seemed too abrupt. Plants would soften the transition. I discovered that I love building planters, which helped organize the yard. The geometry of the concrete block planters contrasted well against the organic shapes of the flowers and plants. 

The garden wall / planter I built below Hubby's office.

Once the office was in, I started looking at the yard differently. I wanted the yard to reflect us, rather than the previous owners. The apricot tree was dead, and needed to be removed. I took a long look at the yard and realized that I wanted to take out three other trees, too. Yet, I was racked with guilt because taking out four trees (even if one was dead) felt wrong to me. One tree was a dwarf orange, only waist tall, so it wasn’t like I was killing an ancient Sequoia tree. But still, I felt badly. Eventually I decided that it was okay for us to make our yard how we want it. Removing the trees opened up the yard a lot, and my ideas started flowing. (Side note: if you are a very stubborn person, you can cut down trees by yourself, refusing help from anyone else. You need a reciprocating saw, and it’s possible your hands will be unusable for two days afterward, too sore or cramped to do anything. But it can be done!)

The back fence after trees were gone, before I added planters.

The previous owners added a patio in sections and a raised brick planter at the back of the yard. “Planter” sounds small but this area is big—fourteen feet wide by thirty feet long, and it’s about a foot higher than the patio. Once I started removing trees, weeds and overgrowth, I found more brick walls that had been covered by leaves, weeds and dirt. It felt exciting—like stumbling upon ancient Mayan ruins!—well, maybe not super old or Mayan. But still, it was fun to unearth walls I’d never seen, and the walls gave me some direction for how to create other zones in the yard. 

Who knew that a brick divider wall was hidden under robust weeds?

                                                                                                                                                                         

A few drawings to illustrate the changes made in our yard:

2019: trees are gone. Wall is found. Pool is deflated. Dirt is...dirt. Mama is tired.

2019--Building a planter against the back fence.

Planter wall, including some cuttings from friends.

In 2019 I made a peacock garden mosaic, and built two more concrete block planters. I also bought gray cement pavers to put in front of Hubby’s office, but I got distracted and they sat in a heap in the yard for months. 

Some of the pavers I painted.
Mixing and matching is marvelous and magnificent.

More pavers. Keeping it lively.

March 2020: the pavers are not finished but at least I started.

In 2020 I built one more planter, and finally got stern with myself about painting the pavers to install in front of Hubby’s office. I wanted an eclectic vibe, and I was inspired by blue and white Moroccan and Mexican tiles I saw online. I used inexpensive blue acrylic and I hand-painted designs onto the pavers. There are a few repeats but most are unique, and it’s a playful mix of traditional looks, modern spatter-painted pavers, and space age designs. I love to mix and match. The painted pavers may not endure for a hundred years, but eighteen months later they still look great. This paver “patio” goes with our blue accent color and provides pattern and whimsy.

During the stressful, isolated months from 2020 through 2021, gardening was a lifejacket for me. In the early months of COVID-19, I didn’t go into stores, so I wasn’t buying materials or plants. But container gardening allowed me to rearrange plants out back, and working in the dirt was soothing to my soul. Doing something that made our yard look good gave me a boost during the pandemic, when I felt helpless and anxious. 

2020

I used river rock from the front yard to fill in spaces.

Summer 2020.

 Lessons I’ve learned and want to share:

1.       When you are redesigning or refreshing a space, see if there are existing elements that work for you (like our brick planter). If so, use some of what is already there. This cuts down on cost, effort and time. Plus, it makes you think more creatively because you are mixing old with new, rather than using a blank slate, and you often you get a more interesting effect.

2.       It’s okay to make your space your own. If you decide to remove something, be it a wall or tree or whatever it is, you’re not a criminal! It’s your space and it should reflect you.

3.       Be patient and celebrate each finished stage, big or small. It’s tempting to want everything to look finished right away. Who doesn’t like immediate gratification? But when a project happens in stages, I appreciate each victory, thereby extending my satisfaction.

4.       Try your hand at DIY projects. They are gratifying because they have your stamp on them. Plus, you save money (sure, they take more time but think of this time as in investment).

 To be honest, our yard still looks a little like a construction site. It’s not finished and may never be, as I tend to rearrange things every few months. The old me would have wanted to share photos only after everything was finished and amazing. The new me knows that perfection does not exist and that the quest for it only pressures me. Sharing real photos, like our giant dirt pile, reminds us that no one’s yard or life is flawless. 

And so, to keep things relatable, here’s a list of what else was not pictured: weeds, occasional doggy doo, plant leaves with chomp holes from caterpillars, dog hair on the edge of the patio, more weeds, a gopher hole, supplies jumbled in the side yards, spider webs, bird poop on the planters, rotting premature persimmons that fell on the ground…and more weeds.

Years ago someone said something a bit snarky to me. A mutual friend described all the creative things I do and the other lady said, “Oh, well, I don’t have time for all that.” Her righteous tone implied that I spent time on meaningless stuff, whereas she was doing important things. I shook it off but years later, I almost feel a need to explain my life. Yes, I am lucky that I can spend time on my yard. Sure, it’s not essential, but it brings me joy. My family comes first. I love teaching. I do the chores that need doing. But in my leftover time, I love gardening. It calms me, and it provides beauty (and sometimes tomatoes). My yard looks different from how it used to because I put time in daily. These progress photos span years, so this is not an overnight makeover. 

Spring 2021

Especially in the early days of parenting, I didn’t understand that self care is vital. Gradually I learned that it is important to do something that feeds your soul. If it brings you peace and doesn’t hurt others, do it! Maybe it’s playing music. Maybe it’s going to ball games. For me, it’s reading and gardening. Find whatever it is that feeds your spirit.  

Summer 2021.

Now where was I? Yes, gardening. Anyway, if you love DIY (Do It Yourself) projects the way we do, or if you’re willing to try them to save on cost, you will be amazed at what you can do yourself. Some of my supplies (bricks and plant cuttings) I got for free online—one neighbor’s trash is another’s treasure, right? Making a place look great is not necessarily about spending a lot—it’s about using your imagination. Buy the smaller plant for a better price, and wait for it to grow. Patience will reward you. You need some time, a modest budget, supplies, and the interest in making it your own.

I hope this backyard refresh brightened your day, and I’ll see you again soon, here on the blog. School is starting up and before long I will have loads of student art to share. ‘Til then, I will be moving potted plants around, cursing at the weeds, occasionally finding a Hot Wheels car or Lego brick under layers of dirt, and watching Mother Earth work her magic…

El on Wheels

Sometimes I talk to someone and think, Wow, this person has amazing life stories. I should make this an interview for my blog. My friend Ellen L is the subject of today’s interview. She’s a spicy transplant from New York, although she has called San Diego home since 1975. For thirty years Ellen drove a cab, and she always wears bold earrings and at least ten colors at once. She’s funny, independent and eclectic. I recently emailed to ask if I could interview her for my blog. Mere seconds after I sent the email, Ellen replied and said she was all in. And that should tell you a lot about this fearless lady. She’s spunky and up for adventure. Let the interview begin.

I arrive at Ellen’s house and she calls a greeting through the screen door. Her voice is full of personality. It has a little bit of a New York flavor to it—a sensibility rather than a strong accent. Ellen grins at me and her eyes twinkle. She’s wearing oversized, two-toned eyeglasses, beaded, multicolored earrings, and pink and orange from head to toe. We make our way to the back patio and settle into red chairs. The wind chimes are making peaceful sounds in the breeze, we start gabbing and our reunion begins.

Sarah C: I entitled our interview “El on Wheels” because you spent thirty years driving a taxi around San Diego and you are a senior who rode as a passenger on motorcycles for thousands of miles. You’re opinionated, confident, and not watching life from the sidelines. How do you see yourself?

Ellen L: Bold, but also calm, and a peacenik. I’m fun to be with and a good listener.

SC: How did you get into the cab driving profession and what did you love about it?

EL: It was 1978 and I had moved from New York to San Diego a few years before. My job as a bank teller was feeling stale and so I opened up the Classifieds and started looking for something different. I’d always loved to drive so I looked under “D” and found a listing for “Yellow Cab needs drivers.” It ended up being a wonderful mix of two things I loved: driving and interacting with people. My passengers liked that I was interested in them and they called me for regular rides. One older lady asked me to come into her doctor appointments as a second set of ears. I had real friendships with people I drove again and again.  

SC: Driving a taxi as a woman involved a degree of risk. Were you ever scared and how did you handle that?

EL: I had a few bad rides but I never let fear stop me. 99% of the time, the rides were smooth sailing. I’d take people to the airport or to their doctor. There were a few times when I got a sixth sense that something was off, like the time I suspected that a car was following me. I pulled over, and the other vehicle did, too. I walked up to the driver and asked why he was following me. He said they were searching for a bank robber. When the police removed the passenger from my cab, they found drugs hidden under the back seat. No one was hurt but it certainly rattled me, and I went home early that day. Yet, most of my passengers were decent people and I loved talking with them. The few bad experiences did not tempt me to stop driving. By my choice, my taxi meter went dark in 2008. Fares were becoming harder to get. Town Cars were everywhere, getting our jobs. I actually drove a Town Car for a while before Uber became available, but the transportation business had changed and I decided it was time to retire.

Ellen during her stint as a Town Car driver.

SC: Have you always liked driving?

EL: I’ve always loved being in cars. When I was a kid on Long Island, my dad took us on drives every Sunday. My maternal grandpa was a cabbie, although I was never in his cab. I am really comfortable behind the wheel. We took cross-country trips from New York to California when I was a kid, and so cars and travel have been a large part of my life since birth.

SC: You have traveled on a motorcycle with your husband Joe. What is the longest trip you took with him?

EL: We did lots of short trips, like from San Diego to Las Vegas or Phoenix. Our longest was from Calgary, Alberta, Canada, to San Diego, which is 1,600 miles and took four days. It was hailing in the Canadian Rocky Mountains on the fourth of July, and that was enough for me! Joe often rode his motorcycle to Navy reunions in various states, and I would fly out to meet him and we rode back together.

SC: Were people surprised when they realized two seniors dressed in leather were zooming up on a Harley?

EL: Sometimes, but people focused more on Joe’s bike than on our age. When they saw how Joe had customized his machine with 1,475 studs (attached with epoxy), people often asked to take a photo. Joe customizes everything at our home. His personalized license plates, decorations and mementos are everywhere from the pink front door to the back porch, which is sprinkled with unusual lights, funny quotes and whatever we find intriguing.

SC: Did you and Joe meet because of motorcycles?

EL: No, and he didn’t have one when we met. But he rode an Indian motorcycle as a young man in the Navy. He always loved tinkering with motorcycles and other machines.

SC: How did you meet Joe?

EL: We met in 1981, thanks to my mom, who moved to San Diego a few years before I did. After Joe’s Navy years, he became an appliance repairman. He fixed several of my mom’s appliances and she thought he was a really special guy. We both were single parents (Joe had two sons and I had three kids) and my mom thought our personalities would mesh well. Our first date was at Love’s Wood Pit Barbecue in Mission Valley and we had an immediate connection. We’ve been together ever since.

SC: What is your philosophy on aging?

EL: I don’t relate to it. We’re in our eighties but mentally, I’m eighteen! Of course, my knees creak, but I ignore the aches and pains, and I’m active. Acupressure helps, as does stretching each morning in our hot tub at home. I bike, I walk a lot, and I swim three times a week. I’m keeping the rust from settling!

SC: Were you always active?

EL: Actually, I’ve changed and grown a lot in my adult life. At age thirty-four I began an emotional, spiritual and physical journey. I’d always carried extra weight, and I decided to start taking care of my body more, as well as my soul. This was the beginning of my metamorphosis. I became healthier, and I learned to be more assertive. I began wearing bright colors like pink and orange, and became more outgoing.

SC: It’s hard to picture you as anything but outgoing. What were you like as a child?

EL: I was withdrawn, not a talker. As the oldest of four kids, I felt responsible for others. I got my sense of dependability from my dad, and my desire to help people from my mom. Starting at thirteen, I worked as a mother’s helper, babysat for neighboring families, and that summer I worked in a nearby day camp. These were great experiences and prepared me for becoming a mom. I married young and had three great kids: Shari, Wendi and Jeffrey.

SC: What was your hometown like?

EL: I grew up in Far Rockaway, on Long Island, NY, a small seaside town, where we knew everybody. Frank was our local bus driver on the same route for years. We rode with him to the beautiful beaches on the Atlantic coast. Our mailman was Tommy and our shoemaker was Dominick. We kids roller skated and biked and played with each other all day long. The neighborhood was very safe. We trusted all of our neighbors. I lived in the same apartment from age four until I married. I think that growing up trusting others, and believing that those around me were good, must have led me to feel hope rather than fear when I became a cab driver. Rather than being scared of the unknown, I trusted that things would work out.

SC: Before driving the cab, you worked in banks in Manhattan and San Diego. 

EL: Yes, I love numbers, so banks were a logical fit for that aspect of myself. But the banks where I worked in San Diego had a much slower vibe than the ones in New York. I needed a change, and the taxi gave me that. During my cabbie years I also began volunteering at the San Diego Visitor Center in Horton Plaza. It was so much fun and extremely rewarding to assist thousands of visitors. In those years, they had a short pamphlet from the airport, with all the flight times listed on it. If someone in my cab missed their flight, we looked at the pamphlet for upcoming departures. Volunteering was the same. We volunteers thought outside the box. If someone missed boarding their cruise ship, one of the volunteers found a way to fly them to the next port so they could board. Volunteering was about solving problems, and I put a personal touch on what I did. The center closed about eight years ago, but the group of us who volunteered still had reunions a couple of times a year. Once it is safe to meet again, we will continue our reunions.

SC: Speaking of COVID, connecting socially is important to you. How did you fare during this pandemic?

EL: We’ve done really well, luckily. I make it a point to get out, to be active, and to keep my mind nimble. Although the pool where I swam closed for a while, it has reopened. I continued to walk a lot. I missed the library when it closed so I began subscribing to the Union Tribune newspaper online. I printed their crossword puzzles and Sudoku to keep my mind energized. We have a few favorite television programs, like Jeopardy, Blue Bloods and Bull.

SC: Bull is about a man who analyzes potential jurors. I think the show feeds your appetite for learning about people. You’re not driving the cab anymore, but you still are fascinated by people. 

EL: True!

SC: Since we all spent more time at home last year, did you cook more?

EL: No! I’m the worst cook in the world. Joe asked me not to cook for him anymore! (She cackles.) But I do make a great vegetable soup and salads are my specialty.

SC: Your kitchen is beautiful! It’s small but packed with personality, with red countertops and backsplash, a red vintage stove, and red and pink tiles. Even the microwave is red. There are murals on the kitchen walls and ceilings, as well as in the bathroom. How would you describe your home?

EL: Playland! (Playland is an amusement park, built in 1928 in Rye, NY, near our home on the Rockaway Peninsula.) Our home is fun, comfortable and colorful. Joe loves color! There are personal touches everywhere. (She points to a poster made by her grandkids, hanging on the living room wall. It reads “Happy Birthday, Grinella!”)

SC: You nicknamed yourself “Granella” when you became a grandmother. What’s the backstory?

EL: I didn’t feel old enough to be a typical “Grandma” so I mixed “Gran” with “Ellen” and came up with “Granella.” Eventually the name changed to “Grinella,” which I love. I have four grandkids, Joe has four, and we have eight great-grandkids.

SC: Family connection is important to you. Before the pandemic you used to take yearly trips with your sister to various countries. Do you have a favorite destination?

EL: San Diego is truly my favorite place in the world. But as far as trips go, my first trip with my sister is memorable. This was twenty years ago, or so. We went to Budapest, Prague and Vienna, and stayed in Bed and Breakfasts in people’s homes. Meeting the locals scratched my itch to interact with others from different parts of the world. We liked the small towns rather than the touristy spots. I loved researching where to go and what to do. Other trips I’ve enjoyed include Ireland, England, France, Canada, Mexico and New Zealand.

SC: When COVID-19 is far behind us, what are you looking forward to doing?

EL: I am excited to do a siblings reunion again. My sister lives in San Diego but our two brothers live in Greenwich Village, NYC, and in Rhode Island. Before the pandemic, the four of us used to meet each year in different places. I’m ready for that reunion again!

SC: Is there a quote that you like or that embodies your philosophy on life?

EL: We create our own reality. 

Ellen has created her own unique reality, and she is living her dream. She’s happy, active and curious, and brings light and humor everywhere she goes. It was such fun to chat with Ellen and to hear more of this delightful lady’s stories.

Everyone has interesting stories to share--even the people who think they don’t--and I love learning about people: their pasts, their personalities and their passions.

Thank you to my fun-loving friend Ellen. You inspire me to be fearless, and you brighten my life. Keep sparkling, El!

Gus and the Art Room

 I had an unofficial mascot in my art room this year. 

The story started ten months ago.  Lots of chairs, tables and supplies from other classrooms ended up in my art room so that social distancing could be enforced in each classroom. It was decided that I would go to each classroom to teach art, rather than having kids come to the art room so that COVID-19 exposure could be minimized. Between classes, I went to the art room to grade art and do prep work. Over time, I became accustomed to the towers of chairs and tables in the room. So when a second grader peered into the room recently, his question surprised me.

“Mrs. Sarah, why is there an esophagus in your room?” He asked, and so I glanced over to the mountain of chairs and supplies. Was there a biology model tucked into the mountain? No, I don’t think so. And how does a second grader even know the word “esophagus?” I was impressed.

“Oh! You mean the sarcophagus. That’s from the sixth grade room, and they moved it down here. It took up too much room and they needed to space the sixth graders out more,” I explained to my student. And how does a second grader even know the word “sarcophagus?” Is he some kind of pint-sized Egyptologist?

I decided that Gus the sarcophagus would be my co-teacher. We make a good team. Frankly, I feel like I do more of the work than he does, but he brings a lot of style to the room. Gus and I cooked up some fun art projects for the kids in the final weeks of the school year. 

One of our spring projects was coloring chameleons. I drew a chameleon, photocopied it, and the kids added lots of color to the critters. Bright colors. I told them, “Show me how a chameleon changes colors. Add leaves. Add an environment!” Some kids skimped on the leaves—I think they were worn out and were counting the minutes until school let out—but some kids ran with it. I gave the seventh grade scraps of origami paper to turn into leaves, and this brought an extra dimension to their art. How cute are these?

Kindergarten

Kindergarten

1st gr

1st gr

4th gr

7th gr

7th gr

7th gr

7th gr

Next up: designing a fictitious package of food. It could be based on a real food, I told the kids, but they had to change the name. I also asked them to try to give the food unusual features. My example was “Growtoni,” the rigatoni pasta that makes your hair grow extra fast. The kids used their imaginations and really came up with some creative ideas.  

8th gr

7th gr

3rd gr

4th gr

5th gr

5th gr

7th gr

8th gr

4th gr

8th gr

4th gr

5th gr

My youngest students, Kindergarteners, made 3-d sunflowers last month. I did the prep work but the kids did cutting, gluing and accent drawing to bring these happy flowers to life. They are inexpensive to make, with paper plates from the dollar store, construction paper, pipe cleaners and glue. Each flower is a little bit different, and I think they look cheerful.

And so, another school year has drawn to a close. I am simultaneously shocked that it went so fast, and relieved that it’s June, because it was a big, full year and I need a rest. Thanks for checking out my wonderful students’ creations. Until we meet again, have a healthy and safe summer.

I’ll see you soon, probably at the Dollar Store, where I’ll be looking for things to turn into art supplies…